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Choosing the Present Over Fear

Posted on April 24, 2025 by sharrada

Adi was now a very active toddler. My days were spent taking care of him and managing the home.

On the surface, everything seemed okay. But in my mind, thoughts about his health and future never stopped. They kept me awake most nights. There were times I’d lie frozen in fear, overwhelmed by the unknown. The first doctor’s words would echo in my head, and my thoughts would spiral out of control. I looked fine on the outside, but inside, I was falling apart. I kept asking the same question over and over—“Why me?”

This constant stress was taking a toll on me—mentally and physically. I felt like I was on the edge of a breakdown. Something had to change. Something had to give. That’s when I came across the idea of Mindfulness—living in the present moment. It wasn’t easy at all, but slowly, I learned how to bring myself back from the spiral and just focus on the now.

I realized I couldn’t change what had already happened. And I had no control over what lay ahead in the future. What I had was now—this day, this moment.. And I wanted to make it count.

I started focusing fully on Adi—his therapies, his exercises. I learned from his therapists. I created a routine at home to support him better.

And slowly, I noticed something powerful—Adi was happier when I was happier. He responded so much to my energy. When I stayed positive, it reflected in him. When I was low, it affected him too. That’s when I made a promise to myself: every day, I would try to be better – for him.

And it showed. The same child a doctor once said might never recognize us was now crawling, standing, babbling, calling out Mamma, Mamba, and Deta. He loved playing in the grass. He adored the sea. He would throw tantrums every time we had to leave the beach.

He was our sunshine. And every moment with him was pure joy.

Looking back, I know that shift—choosing to live in the present—changed everything for me. I stopped trying to control (most of the times) what I couldn’t and started embracing the now.

Adi didn’t just help me heal—he gave me purpose. He made me stronger. He showed me how to find light, even when everything felt dark.

My handsome little boy, my fighter, taught me about love, hope, and being grateful for all the small and big blessings that we receive every single moment.

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Hi, I’m Sharrada, a mother and the voice behind DearAdi.com. This space is where I pour my memories and my journey with Adi—one word, one post at a time—keeping his light alive while finding my own path to healing. If you’ve ever loved and lost, I hope my words remind you that you’re not alone. If you’re here, I see you, and I hope my words bring you comfort.

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